Thursday, October 7, 2010

Ever Since Omar Was Hired--An Ode to the 2006-2009 Mets

I was bored of college essays, and engulfed by Phillies statuses, so to make myself feel better I wrote this ode to the Mets woes. Sung to the tune of “We Didn’t Start the Fire” by Billy Joel. If you don’t know the tune/idea of that song, which goes chronologically through events in 20th century history, this won’t be as funny, so listen to it first:



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2a2SS0zqmzk



This has been my baseball life over the past four years. I'm sure you'll revel in my misery. Enjoy.



"Ever Since Omar was Hired"



(2006 and Before)

Braden Looper, Armando, all the saves that they would blow

Heath Bell, Mo Vaughn, Joe...McEwing



Kazmir for Zambrano, Minaya from Toronto

No more Jim Duquette, make way for the New Mets



Omar signs some big names, Mets start to win some games

David Wright gets called up, things are really lookin’ up



Until the playoffs come around, Pedro and El Duque down

Endy Chavez makes a leap, but Beltran watches strike three



Chorus:

Ever since Omar was hired,

The fans have been yearning, but the players are hurting

Ever since Omar was hired,

We’ve been the joke of the league, as we choke up our lead



(2007)

Pedro’s arm is still weak, Phillies are the team to beat

Jimmy Rollins, screw you, the frontrunners hate you



Dauner Sanchez makes some cash, then gets in a car crash,

Moises Alou, black and blue, he lands on the DL too



Brooklyn has a winning team, but Queens is starting Shawn Green

Marlon Anderson is lame, his interference lost the game



Glavine lets up seven runs, before the first inning is done

Seventeen, left to play, what else do I have to say?



Chorus



(2008)

Trot Nixon, Matt Wise, Pedro’s father just won’t die

Jimmy Rollins, MVP, somebody kill me



Randolph fired at midnight, Mets bullpen is a fright

Injuries, all around, Billy Wagner goes down



Johan doesn’t help us much, cuz’ we suck in the clutch

Twenty-nine blown saves, Luis Ayala digs our grave



Lidge has a perfect year, Phillies fans get to cheer

Mets out on the final day cuz Aaron Heilman can't play


Chorus



(2009)

Bernie Madoff stole our money, stop laughing, it’s not funny

Tim Redding’s facial hair, Castillo tripping down the stairs



Omar’s mad at Adam Rubin, even as he signed more Cubans

F-mart is a bust, not to mention JJ Putz



Disabled list is growing fast, Tony Bernazzard gets sacked

Olly is a head case, Ryan Church missed third base



Carlos Beltran’s getting old, Wright’s helmet is a salad bowl

But don’t forget, that’s not all, Luis Castillo dropped the ball



Chorus



Finally, Omar’s been fired

But even with him gone, it’ll still go on, and on, and on, and on…

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